"Run 8 miles this morning and all shall be forgiven"And that's how it went this morning. I spent the last 10 days not really wanting to run, but not wanting to not run. Last weekend I just was not motivated to run. I wanted to do something (other than work) and running was just not it.
And I was okay with that.
Normally, I am in a foul mood because I want to run, but I can't. Last weekend though, I just didn't care. And I really was surprised by that. I thought, no problem - I'll just get in runs during the week to make up for it.
Never happened.
I think there was one half-hearted attempt one morning, but then I just went into work early instead. Work has been consuming my time a lot in the past 2 months. At first I was alright with it. I was feeding off the adrenaline rush of a constant deadline to keep a project moving. Then the inevitable happened. Everything seemed to hit all at once - the perfect storm. I was working on two projects in design (and two under construction) and all of a sudden schedules for both design projects aligned and I found myself needing to be in two places at once and I was at a loss for what to do. I was almost frozen like a deer in headlights.
I've never been one to ask for help. Part of it is I am a control freak (probably the biggest part). I accept this although others may not and I do what it takes to get my work done - but usually at a cost. I spent a lot of long nights and early mornings to keep things moving, skipped runs and certainly anything resembling a good night's sleep. And I think it has finally caught up to me. I've said it all before -- life is all about balance, and my life is far from being in balance right now. This morning's run was a first step towards regaining that balance, but I have a lot to do.
My spring half-mary is a little different this year, but I think it is exactly the kind of race I need. I am going to run the Anti-Mini Marathon on May 7th. It's a little unconventional, but it looks to be a very runner friendly race. My plans to run the spring trail run series is out the window. I've had a conflict on a couple of the races, so it looks like I'll have to wait for the fall series and look for trail runs during the summer. Still deciding on my full marathon for the fall. I am leaning towards the Indianapolis Monumental Marathon this year, but we'll see.
Getting back to my run this morning: I had a pretty good run. I actually wanted to run and felt ready to get back out there. I started early - before the sun was even up and I finished just as the sun came over the horizon. There were birds chirping and flowers blooming. It was great to take it all in. And as I was in the final stretch of my run, "Somewhere Over The Rainbow" came on my iPod -- we had it played at Everett's funeral and it just seemed so fitting for it to play when it did. The sky was lightening up to a beautiful blue, the sun was the orangey-pink color that sunrises often are and birds were flying overhead. It felt like a good morning wish from Everett and just made my run that much better.
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